I turned away a prospective student today.
"Thank you for choosing CFMAF Martial Arts, Colorado's leader in providing realistic training for adults and families." It is my normal response when my phone rings. The person on the other end quickly spoke up and introduced himself. He told me that I am fourth or fifth school that he has spoken to today and that he has set up appointments with each one. He then told me that he is ready to enroll today with whichever school that he selects.
I politely interrupted him to let him know who I am and to ask for his name again. As he told me, I continued to listen, I mean truly listen to him. Something was different. Maybe my years in the military combined with my years as police officer, allowed for me to hear something that the other schools he had called may have missed.
"Why are interested in learning martial arts" I inquired "You have a serious interest by calling three or four schools before calling me."
"I didn't like AA and the treatment facilities. They didn't help." he said. "It isn't about if you like them or not, it is about YOU NEEDING THEM. They can only help if you submit and allow for them to help. Look, I don't care if you train with me in the future or not, but I do care that you prove to yourself and to your wife that you are taking the necessary steps to defeat this addiction." I said.
He took a brief second and then said "I do want to train with you though. Just talking with you now I know that I have now reached the right place." he explained. "Well, if you want to train with us, you must first show to your wife that your love for her is greater than your excuses. Go back to a treatment center. Once you are there follow what they need for you to do. Then when your sponsor feels that you are ready, both of you call me and then i will assist you, but until then you have to help yourself first by contacting a treatment program and going to meetings."
He paused for a moment. I could hear him struggling "None of the others took this time to talk to me. Thanks."
I responded, "Well I am not one of the others. I care about you reestablishing your marriage and controlling your addiction. This all starts with you and sadly it can all end with you."
Before hanging up he asked for name again and how he can contact me. I told him that I would send him a text and I did so. Just a few minutes after sending him a text he wrote me "Thank you Isaac. You have no idea how much your time and intelligent words mean."
I wrote him back "You are welcome. The next time I hear from you I hope to hear that you are engaged in the fight against alcoholism and not that you have surrendered to it. Yes, it will be a difficult fight, but you and your wife are worth fighting for." With that I received his last text...
"Thanks again so much...I have to detox first but I did forward her all your messages and told her that after I get this poison out of my body that I want to study under you. Even though I'm drunk I can tell that you are a true human being. Thank you again."
